I finally had to admit it my body, spirit, and soul need rest. Deep rest. This weekend, that’s exactly what I’m giving myself.
I moved into my private studio on October 25. It’s definitely not the best part of town, but for $296 a week, I’m making it work. The first week I was here, there were two shootings nearby, which shook me instantly. But I don’t hang out, I don’t entertain chaos, and I keep to myself. Isolation has become my protection and my peace.
I haven’t cooked in about three weeks because I’ve been cleaning and treating my unit nonstop. My room was finally treated last week, and ever since, I’ve been wiping, scrubbing, organizing day by day trying to make this little space feel like home.
By Thursday, I was ready to finally restock my cabinets. I ordered groceries using Afterpay, wanting to avoid the overpriced local stores. I spent $169, but with fees the total came to $199. Fine. I needed food.
But then this driver who was only five miles from my home claimed he got lost. Then he sat outside my building pretending he couldn’t speak English, refusing to deliver my order. Mind you, Walmart was tracking his car, and they saw my perishable items had been sitting in his vehicle for over 30 minutes. This man tried to steal my groceries! Thankfully, Walmart stepped in, handled it fast, and refunded me immediately. A blessing in disguise… but still exhausting.
Food insecurity isn’t my story, but intentional planning is. I had made this grocery list specifically for recipes I enjoy preparing. When I’m working outside the home, I prefer to take my lunch with me. Fast food does nothing for my body, and eating out daily drains your pockets. So I created a menu of the meals I buy the most, and now I make them at home. From egg-and-cheese protein boxes to soup-and-sandwich combos my refrigerator is finally stocked again.
On top of everything, I have three cases coming up in January, two new filings, and a whole lot of legal activity that keeps me busy. I’ve decided to postpone going back to school until I’m fully stabilized. With the money I’m saving right now, I plan to pay off debts, rebuild my credit, and continue moving toward purchasing my property. So much is happening at once, but I’m staying focused.
This weekend, though? I’m choosing me.
Today is for pampering myself, cooking, watching movies, and soaking in the tub. And let me tell you cooking again feels AMAZING. I am going to be in my little kitchen all weekend long.
No live TV for me unless absolutely necessary. I’m streaming movies back-to-back and resting my mind from the dysfunction of current events. No sports, no noise, no distractions. Just peace.
I want to spend quality time alone. I wish I could truly explain the level of peace you feel when your mind is quiet, your space is clean, and you can focus on your mental wellness. My birthday promise to myself this year was to “love myself more” and “focus less on how others see or feel about me.” And today, I’m honoring that.
Enjoy your Saturday… I definitely will.
