CELEBRATING 9 YEARS OF CELIBACY
Loving Myself Back to Sanity
If you know anything about me, you know I hate playing stupid or a victim. I’ve never been comfortable wearing either role. My independence and my determination to live free from judgment are what keep me grounded. They are the anchors that remind me who I am when the world around me gets noisy.
Let me start by saying this clearly: I honestly could not care less about how Scottie feels or what he thinks about me. I never did. My goal was never to be on the sidelines of someone else’s circus. I’m not jealous of Larsa, his children, or his career. That narrative doesn’t belong to me, and it never has.
My focus is simple becoming a better version of myself.
Right now, my energy is directed toward building C.A.V. Enterprises. That’s where my mind is, that’s where my heart is, and that’s where my future lives.
Of course, whenever you’re focused and determined, there will always be someone waiting for the chance to say something stupid. Especially when rejection enters the room. Some men simply cannot handle it. When their advances don’t work, they look for ways to belittle or degrade you. In Las Vegas, I’ve seen it happen more times than I can count.
Recently I was sharing a story with a coworker about a car dealer who took issue after I explained that I don’t date and that I prefer wine over sex. She thought I was joking. But I wasn’t.
I’ve joked before that Black men in Vegas don’t date Black women and certainly not intellectual women. Whether that’s perception or reality is a conversation for another day. But what struck me about that interaction wasn’t the insult. It was the opportunity hidden inside the moment.
His sales pitch got my attention just long enough for me to learn something valuable.
Car auctions.
That one conversation sparked an idea that I’m now turning into a business venture. I’ve decided to develop Heart 2 Heart Transportation, starting with three vehicles. The plan is simple: purchase vehicles at auction and place them on rental platforms like Turo or other local rental systems.
Each vehicle can generate around $1,500 per month.
Three cars means roughly $4,500 per month in passive income to start. After about three months, my goal is to expand with three additional vehicles. Six cars would bring that number to about $9,000 per month, creating a stable stream of income that can support my larger vision.
Why does that matter?
Because the properties I’m scouting right now range from $3,000 to $5,000 per month. My long-term plan involves co-living spaces and short-term shared housing. To make that move responsibly, I need to generate $9,000 to $15,000 per month in income.
So the cars become the bridge.
Eventually, I’d love to secure an old gas station or small repair facility where I can hire a mechanic and maintain the vehicles on site. That turns a small rental concept into a transportation operation.
Women like me don’t sit around waiting for something to happen.
We make things happen.
I love the job I’m working right now, and my goal is to retire from this seat. The irony is that the skills I’m using today are the same skills I developed years ago in Chicago. When you’ve done something before, you know you can do it again only bigger, smarter, and wiser.
Vegas has taught me so much about life. About people. But most importantly, about myself.
I am determined to be successful. That’s not just ambition it’s purpose.
And I refuse to spend every waking moment worrying about who might try to harm me or what people think about me. Life is too short for that kind of fear.
For the record, I rarely date Black men, and I am definitely not attracted to self-absorbed control freaks. So when the car dealer asked, “You looking to buy a car?” a simple, effective opening considering I actually am in the market I already knew exactly what kind of conversation it was going to be.
The moment his attention shifted from selling a car to reacting to rejection, the tone changed. Insults replaced professionalism. And just like that, the interaction proved my theory all over again.
Cute attempt.
But you can’t pimp a butterfly.
So I’ll take my chances with a credible dealer.
The decision to launch Heart 2 Heart Transportation isn’t about proving anything to anyone. It’s about strategy. Car rentals whether through Turo or similar platforms can be a practical way to supplement income when you’re building other ventures.
In my case, that income helps support my plans for co-living housing projects.
God has had me up at night working logos, branding, marketing, strategy. Creating. Building. Developing ideas that will eventually become businesses. There is still so much work ahead of me: securing funding, researching grants, applying for loans, and putting the right structure in place.
But I’m grateful.
Grateful to be in an environment where I can learn the fundamentals of business at a deeper level. Grateful for the opportunity to lead by example. Because my real goal is not just to succeed but to show others what hard work, dedication, and perseverance can produce.
Vegas is a fascinating city. Men approach me every kind of way imaginable. Sometimes I pretend to be clueless on purpose it tells me everything I need to know about their intentions.
But truthfully, I love living here.
When I go out, it’s simple: maybe $20 on a slot machine $50 max dinner, maybe a show, and then I go home. I watch the chaos around me and think about the kind of life I actually want.
Peace is underrated.
I see what some women go through in the dating world, and honestly, I just don’t have the energy for it. Scottie doesn’t influence my dating life if anything, he reminds me why I don’t date.
I’m not a lesbian, and I don’t hate men.
But it’s surprisingly difficult to find a man who can simply enjoy a woman’s presence without expecting sex as the entry fee.
The moment you establish that boundary, many men become defensive. They know their usual approach won’t work. And childish men will often resort to insults.
Ironically, those insults are often a gift.
They reveal red flags early.
Take dinner, for example. If a meal costs $275, I’m bringing my $150 with me. That way there’s no confusion about expectations afterward.
That’s what grown women do.
At the end of the day, Loving Myself Back to Sanity means protecting my peace, honoring my boundaries, and staying focused on the vision God placed in my heart.
Not the noise.
Not the opinions.
Not the circus.
Just the work.
And the woman I’m becoming while doing it.
