Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. For the past five weeks, I’ve been stuck on sick leave, isolated inside my house, and battling not just my health, but the circumstances that surround it. I accepted a role that was supposed to be remote work, yet they refuse to honor my accommodations. Instead, I’m forced into exposure to stalkers, exposure to germs, and exposure to stress that’s breaking down my mind, body, and spirit.
Because I’ve been sick, I can’t even go out and find another job to replace this drama. I can’t taste my food, I can barely eat, and I’m locked in a room trying to maintain mental wellness while my body feels like it’s betraying me.
And let me be clear: I am NOT a “sit at home waiting for a check” type of Democrat. That’s not me. I prefer to remain active, to keep my mind sharp, to keep working and being productive. That is what keeps me whole. Right now, everything feels out of order my mind, my spirit, and my body.
Here’s how it started: a co-worker shared a vape pen with me about a month ago. When I inhaled, I choked on saliva immediately. Three days later, I started spitting up green discharge. Since then, I’ve been spiraling. I haven’t had contact with anyone else, and yet my body has been in chaos. The same person also had issues with blood, which makes me wonder even more about what’s happening inside of me.
I can’t explain where my mind is right now. The uncertainty about my future eats at me. I love what I do, and I make great money, but they refuse to respect my doctor-approved accommodations to work from home. Now I’m being pushed to relocate either into a shared or private residence in the middle of my legal appeal against Pippen.
I am three months away from a win, and yet the pressure against me is relentless. Sometimes, I wish I had never met this man. I think about the six rings I put on his finger, the son I gave birth to whom he murdered, and the fact that decades later, he still refuses to let me go. It drives me insane.
So don’t pray for me pray for peace.
I am screaming from a box you can hear, but you do not hear my pain. And here I am, holding on to the little peace of mind I have left.
